Snow...

It snowed today!

We haven't had a good snow in Philly for a few years and it was the first time we ever had to shovel since we moved into our new place last June.  We probably didn't have to shovel yet, but Matt is always pre-empting and they are saying we might get 8" or so.

It was so very beautiful

This week has been so cold, all I have been thinking about is how we managed as kids - standing at the bus stop in the mornings and going out for recess during the day.  The high this week in Vermont was zero degrees and I am shivering and suicidal at 20 degrees here in Philly.  We never knew the difference as children.  No one every told us we should be freezing, it is all we knew.

The snow made me forget for a moment how very cold and bitter it is, and to forget for a moment how very much pain my body is in.

I try not to write about my back pain because it doesn't really help anyone, it isn't all that interesting and it's much more fun to take pretty pictures and write about something  fun, but if I am to be true, then it is only right to mention what I am thinking about so often lately. 

Today is a really bad day for pain.

Pain makes you fuzzy to everything else - not quite forget it, but to not have the energy to re-focus on the things that are right and good and true.  It makes me snappy and easily irritated and sometimes bitterly jealous at others around me who move easily and don't cry out when they bend over.

In my heart, I trust that God will rescue me from this pain at some point.  I know that he can heal me and so in the meantime, I cling to Him and his promises in my life - that He is enough for me and He will deliver me as no one else can.

The snow is often a symbol of newness, of starting afresh and I needed to remember that possibility today!

Also it was fun to wear the hat I bought when i went to the Arctic years ago...

*I also have a number of doctors appointments so if God chooses to heal me that way, that would be fine too!